In spite of your chagrin, your teenage son or daughter may already be sexually-conscious or even active, and as such talking to them about such a personal issue can be an awkward experience for the both of you. There are a lot of things which can go wrong during 'the talk'.
You may have too many reservations, or your teenager is adamant on clamming up due to the nature of the discussion. To be sure, you have to prepare yourself for a lot of roadblocks to a healthy conversation about sex, but in order to get over them, you have to be familiar with each so you'll be able to hurdle each as soon as it pops into view.
Obviously you'll have to consider your teenager's maturity in handling such a conversation. The initial reactions of teenagers to sex are varied, but none of these are encouraging. Boys smirk, while girls shrink in embarrassment.
In such instances you need to initiate the conversation in piecemeal portions. Start by purchasing a related book and have your teenager browse through the pages on his or her own pace. Initiate the conversation as soon as your teen is willing to comfortably listen.
There is also a possibility that the difficulty lies in your personal relationship with your teen. There may be some unresolved issues which makes a heart-to-heart talk impossible for the moment. If the problem is superficial and resolvable with a cool-off period, give the child some breathing space. If it is a serious relationship problem, it is best to hand over the conversation with someone you can trust, while you straighten out the problem with your teenage son or daughter.
Some teenagers may believe that you already know that they are sexually aware even before you engage in the initial conversation. You may have discovered sex toys discreetly concealed in your teenager's closet and are struggling to get through such a drastic revelation.
Keep in mind that a teenager's mind is at the height of curiosity, and sex toys can be a good thing if it is used to sate such a curiosity. If you have to tell your teen that you do know of his or her possession of sex toys, avoid the urge to scold, and try to keep the conversation positive by stressing out the importance of proper hygiene, especially with the use of implements like sex toys.
Your teen may think that he or she knows everything there is to know about sex. You yourself have thought along these lines when you were an adolescent. Fortunately, this dilemma can easily be resolved; your teenager hints that he or she is willing to engage in conversation for its own sake. It's pretty much a fairground for you, as everything is open for discussion, from pregnancy to contraception to sexually-transmitted diseases.
Be sure to discuss the issues in the backdrop of proper family values, and your teenager will discover that his or her preconceived notions on sex were not as rock-solid as they thought it would be. You can take this opportunity to fill in the gaps with the truth. Engaging in a conversation with your teen can be quite a task, but with the right approach, even those who are adamant on clamming up will be open to conversation in due time.
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